Tell or not tell you:
One of the difficulties facing me is "non-biological" parents is what to expect and how to tell their children their method of conception.
Couples who have or will have a child through assisted reproduction with donated eggs or sperm, often arise whether or not to tell their children about the donation. To try to guide these partners we will see what the situation is my natural, that is what the majority of couples who are in this situation.
The psychological development of a child is based largely on the quality of the relationship the child has with his parents. It has been established that children who have strong emotional ties with their parents are more self-esteem, are more sociable and have a lower risk of suffering psychological problems as they grow, children who feel less secure.
Since the sense of security of a child with respect to their parents depends on the quality of the interaction between father / mother and child, it can be argued that, rather than biological kinship, which determines the psychological health of a child is the sensitivity and responsiveness of parents. In other words, it is the quality of the child's relationship with social parents who educate, who called Dad and Mom, what matters most.
A problem with keeping the circumstances of conception secret is that the child may accidentally hear the other person knows, or at a time of family crisis such as divorce of parents, and therefore lose confidence in people to apparently they have been cheated.
Comparing the quality of relations father / mother and son, and social and emotional development of children in families created as a result of the donation and methods of natural families and families with adopted daughter has yielded some interesting findings they may guide parents to make a decision about telling or not.
In a study conducted at the University of London by Dr. Susan Golornbok and his team of psychologists, 41 families compared to a child conceived through IVF and 45 with a child conceived with donor families with two control groups (43 with a child and 55 conceived naturally with an adopted child in early childhood). The children were aged between 4 and 8 years, there were more or less the same number of children in each group and the families were as similar as possible in terms of age of the parents, number of children in family and social class.
The comparison results showed that the quality of parental care in families with a child conceived by assisted conception was higher than shown by families with a child conceived naturally, even when donation was used. The quality of parental care of foster parents was similar to that of parents of children conceived through assisted reproduction, suggesting that genetic ties are less important to the functioning of the family that intense desire to be a parent.
Importantly, none of the parents whose child was conceived by donation had told him the child.
Near adolescence, adopted children are interested in knowing their biological parents.
There are generally accepted in our society to explain the decision, but not to explain reproductive formats donation procedures.
Parents are concerned that could cause unhappiness in children. That also want to stop.
Children conceived with donor have a problem that does not have the adoptive parents: there is very little information that can give the child about his genetic father. To every man he sees, the question will arise: will he be ?. From this point of view, say could create more problems rather than make things easier.